smilesforlies.

2009-12-11T02:22:00.000+08:00

they say when youre angry, you should always put it in writing. they say it helps. i havent even told my story and alr i feel like letting it go. writing about it is taking too much of my energy. and im not angry anymore.

guess it works. heh.

back.

2009-10-16T16:50:00.005+08:00

spent quite some time away from cyber world. been reading up and investing my time is a different kind of art. which is bad cos right now assignments are piling up and ive not gotten anything done. especially publication assignment. argh. anyway.

love the bold colour and the ruffles from her! though i dont personally wear them. but i want that dark green kimono/wrap dress! so pretty. and, have you seen the shoes from AMcQ!?

2009-08-29T01:41:00.001+08:00

so scene can

a month later

2009-08-21T22:46:00.002+08:00

been busy. been lazy.
one more thing, fuck your scene.

tipping, richard.

2009-07-08T22:34:00.001+08:00

many lies have been told about me.
i wrote the lies down,
but that didnt make the reason for the lies any clearer to me
and i am left bewildered and confused.

i made the words bigger
in hopes that i would find some understanding in them.
but they stand unyielding before me,
immovable and suffocating.

i made the words smaller,
hoping they would disappear.
but they stay like a stain.
persistent and insisting.

i tried to burn the words away,
but only burnt myself.
and now i have deep scars on my skin,
and the enduring ache of memory.

i tried to cut the words from my page,
but i only cut myself.
and i mourn the blood loss,
that i will never get back.

i try to remember my life,
and words that make me strong.
but the lies rake and tear at my skin,
cutting me from the earth.

i live,
and all i have are pieces of the truth.
but with these little pieces,

i am unflinching and unforgiving.

******

i want to be pretty too. why cant i be pretty, like all those other girls..

must work harder. must.

2009-07-07T02:14:00.002+08:00

its a blur, click for a larger/clearer one.
mann. well at least friday's clear after 12..

2009-07-05T23:23:00.002+08:00

such an old one, i love it.

nothing ever gets easier. just alot harder. i;m afraid for my future, to be quite honest. what if i dont make it? i really want to try for that scholarship degree, but 0.0

on to a less serious note, i really really just want a huge closet. wall-in closet please. i'm running out or storage space. my bags, oh my bags. my dad dumped them all into a huge box. sad. theyre all squished. but im still buying bags. some love shoes, but im a bag person.

and, orange hair again?

want

2009-06-28T23:27:00.001+08:00

to leave this shithole, this judgmental shithole of a place, what the hell does everybody want from me?

mediocre

2009-06-28T21:20:00.005+08:00

lack of skillz.

2009-06-28T04:12:00.004+08:00

there are some things that happen for reasons, reasons that cant be explained. right now, i cant explain this. this thing going on. its confusing, yet intriguing. maybe its the thrill that comes along with it.. but i dont know. for sure.

for some reason, blogger is kinda screwing up the new post section? cos i cant see the icons for adding photos and such. its really annoying.

2009-06-22T13:06:00.004+08:00

back in Singapore. i really do not think this is where i belong. i get back, and immediately i feel all the poison rushing back into me. could say i got into a mini-fight with my mum over a small incident. i really wonder whats my purpose here sometimes.

sometimes i miss school because of this.

2009-06-07T23:32:00.003+08:00

second skin

2009-06-07T23:16:00.004+08:00

now that everything's over, the sculpture workshop, the internship at BPGH.. thank GOD. have been so tired, sick of wearing jeans all the times, had to be "conservative". i do not know how im gna survive when i start teaching in 2 years time. :(

on a lighter note, SYDNEY SOON! screw H1N1, i'll take all the precautions i have to, but i'm not letting that affect me nuh-uhhh.

should i ?!

2009-05-21T01:05:00.003+08:00

navy

or

black

?!

99 buckeroos, should i ? its so pretty!

picture post 1

2009-05-21T00:30:00.006+08:00

was out with yana on tuesday. teehee. more pictures up at facebook.

go face book k lol.

featuring my copy painting of one of warhol's Mick Jagger from the Rolling Stones!
teehee.

fade

2009-05-18T01:24:00.003+08:00

guessing life has improved for everyone.
while i fade to nothing.

master of disguise.

seriously.

2009-04-24T01:49:00.005+08:00

i think i need to scare myself. i need to remind myself that THERE IS NOT MUCH TIME LEFT.

1. hist essay
yet to start
due monday 27th

2. webdesign
psd file done, yet to begin dreamweaving
due tuesday 28th

3. model making
yet to fucking complete
due wednesday 29th

4. painting
getting there, the only thing i care about to do
review on thurs 30th

5. sculpture
ARGH yet to fucking complete
due friday 8th

WELL YES, THAT PUTS EVERYTHING INTO PERSPECTIVE.
BRB GOING TO DIE NOW.

maybe.

2009-04-24T01:30:00.002+08:00

cut my finger last night by accident. dude, it bled like hell. you know i really like the picture above. i cant seem to remember where its from, goddamnit. i hate it when my brain/mind fails me like that. even so, still love it. maybe i could try doing this for one of my works. maybe.

on a totally unimportant and irrelevant note, meant for my own rambling and for noone to comprehend exactly;

communication might be failing us. this thing going between us might fall apart, but it wont. i refuse to let it. tomorrow's always another day for a classic lather, rinse, repeat situation. its needs a diferent twist. maybe after rinsing you could condition for that extra care. maybe that'll help. maybe.

the devil wears prada.

2009-04-22T21:41:00.005+08:00

figured it would be time for a new start. i deleted all my old posts, but i immediately regretted it. i just remembered all my pictures that were here. but thats alright, i'll survive. i cut my bangs today, this time it wasnt as FAIL as i had expected it to be. i was successful at making my face smaller ^^

devil wears prada is playing in the background. i had the sudden urge to watch it. did no work today, skipped school as well. but im heading back tmrw to continue my painting. i hope i can save my work!